Funny Church Signs

I am a fan of funny signs. I sort of collect them. So when I wrote The Coldwater Warm Hearts Club, I wanted to put an epigram, the verbal equivalent of a sign, at the beginning of  each chapter. Here are a few of them, interspersed with some of my favorite funny church signs:

After God created the heavens and the earth, He pronounced them good. Of course, He made squirrels, too, but everyone’s allowed at least one mistake.

~ George Evans, terror of fluffy-tailed rodents everywhere

Mrs. Chisholm is suffering from insomnia. She requests prayer and a recording of Pastor Mark’s sermon.

~ Marjorie Chubb, Captain of the Methodist Prayer Chain

The Reverend Harold Hiney will be filling in for Pastor Mark for our midweek chapel and the regular Sunday services. Our visiting speaker invites us to call him Pastor Harold.

No one calls him Harry.

~ from the Methodist Church bulletin

The sermon topic next Sunday will be “Is Hell Real?”

Come early and listen to our choir practice!

~ from a Methodist Church bulletin

Now it's YOUR turn. Have you seen any funny signs lately?